you could never comprehend how sorry i am.

i don't want this tot be my year again.

i want to grab the wheel

and veer back twords the road instead of

off of the cliff.

i was heading to your birthday party

and my birthday party

where we would smile and laugh and celebrate out lives

i wasn't heading to your funeral

or my funeral

and i'm not dreading the end of the journey anymore.

why are my wheels still tilted to the left?

my fingers are shaking and i can write this because

there's nothing left in me.

i emptied out my tank of gas again

so i could go.

somehow it doesn't seem like that makes much sense.

i sold my car for gas money.

i know you're crazy and an enabler

but i need your help cottonhead.

i need your help to avoid alpha and omegas lighting bolts.

i don't want them to hate me

and you can help me

if you can help her destroy herself.

you can help me better myself

if you can help her destroy herself.

if i could always be with you

and if we could always be lying with our faces to the sky

reflecting us like a mirror

so i could watch you kiss my neck and gaze at me

i think i would always be ok.