feeee

feel shitty.
but that's pretty unimportant.
i like to complain and talk about how i don't feel ok
and say i'm not feeling bad for myself.

there really is no reason for my mood.
ever.
i'm just never satisfied, and it's probably all my fault, but i really don't know how to be satisfied.
i honestly don't go in to things expecting them to be boring or stupid or unstimulating.
It's just that everything ends up making me feel that way even though I feel like I'm not in a closed minded state of low expectations.

i mean, it really doesn't feel like it,
but i feel like how i feel is all my fault.
i should change it, but when i try to smile and let things go
i end up getting this feeling in my stomach like i'm going to throw my intestines up.

still
it's all my fucking fault for being such a hard to please complanitory little bitch.